hardest thing

the hardest thing about quitting smoking is wanting to be healthy more than wanting to smoke. i don’t think i’ll ever get to the point of wanting to stop smoking. but i can believe that in the near future, i’ll want to be healthy and that desire surpassing my desire to keep smoking. diets never worked for me because whenever i tried to do a diet, i end up gaining weight. when i think of quitting smoking as an end in itself, i want to smoke more. i’ve been smoking more in the past 48 hrs as a result of a decision to not smoke over the weekend. i’m failing miserably at going just for the weekend without smoking. about a month ago, i went a month without smoking and during that time, i didn’t even have urges i was fighting against. so yeah, i guess the hardest thing about quitting smoking is wanting something else more than wanting to smoke. that something else is not happening just yet…